Measure your actions by love. This is obviously a borrowed idea birthed by God and developed over time by numerous amazing people. I have been thinking a lot these days that at the end of each day I would like to measure of success by how well I loved.
This idea is way too big to cover in its entirety, so I want to break it down into a few parts.
1. Love measuring me. Integrity is doing what is right when no one is looking, or more importantly, judging (measuring). If I start adjusting my life to be built on the measure of love, then integrity will be a natural by-product. Love is watching me always. We all struggle with a myriad of sins. And this blog is a not judgement zone. But try participating in your vice with these prerequisite questions: Will this love? Does this action add to or take away from my capacity to love? I won't cheat and give the answer away, but I will leave you with this: every single vice will take debit from your capacity to love and will eventually come to light.
*As a side note: if you don't love yourself, then find someone qualified and talk with them. An inability to love ourselves is a dangerous place to be. Everyone is worthy of love: especially from themselves.
2.a. Love measuring my with-you. With-you is the most important place for love to be a measurement. Am I acting with love when I am with you? This is also the most difficult place to always act with love because it involves people, and people can be hard to love. For real... it's just really difficult to love people sometimes. We are all broken to an extent. Loving people becomes especially difficult when I add my charming personality to the mix. I am *always right, I have the *best ideas, and my way is generally the *best way. I am a blast to be around. (*These are my confessions. And trust me, I am working on this.) Mix that beautiful mess with a world that has its axis on a tilt. It becomes difficult for me to always act in a loving way. In this little category, what helps me the most is to think about an equal sign. When acting outside of love with frustration, anger, angst, sarcasm, etc., the equal sign or result is the feeling of frustration, anger, angst, sarcasm, etc... all reflected in my own being. The with-you that receives my unloving actions gets an equal sign of either: 1. Hurt feelings, 2. Loss of respect/trust towards me, 3. A negative self reflection of "I am wrong/bad/dumb/etc." 4. A poor view of love. (This one really stings because the Bible says that the way the world will know Jesus is by how we share love.) To recap: I get an ulcer, a bad reputation, and immediate regret, and the with-you gets a bad day with a poor view of love. So choose love with each other. Be measured by love. Equal love.
2.b. Love measuring with-you socially. Are your social actions a measurement of love? Our filter of decision making while with friends and loved ones should always be, "Is this loving?" I am defaulting to an example I recently heard on this. The person I am grabbing this from in no way endorses me, my blog, or any of the things I need to say to make sure and give credit where credit is due. I don't even know him personally, but Ben Stuart nails it with this message. (Worth the watch at least through the first 15 minutes. Actually, I take that back; watch all 51 minutes.)
3. Love measuring my love for Love. Mind blown, I know. Up to this point you have no doubt read my relationship-with-God undertones in each of my blogs. Well the most perfect picture of love is God. He is perfect Love. Love doesn't even happen without him. Capacity for love is non-existent without God. When my head hits the pillow, I want to know that I loved God today. It's as simple as that and the most important measurement of my day. I cannot share love or be measured by love without having Love. I know... real deep. It is truly that simple. How I show God love: acknowledge I cannot _____ without him and his grace, take care of orphans and widows, give of myself out of my abundance (and trust me, we all have abundance somewhere), treat others better than myself, erase idols from my day, refrain from judging others, and pray in all ways trusting his way over mine.
Think about the addition we give the world when we measure ourselves by love. When I give love, the other side of the equal sign looks like others being lifted up, smiles, laughter, encouragement, joy, freedom, growth, knowledge, friendship, life, breath, rest- sweet, sweet rest, and all of this on a reciprocating crescendo of shared love because love is contagious.
Dear Sweet Child of Mine,
You will be the echo of my desire to share love in this world. I want to add to the place where you will experience life, not take away. One person at a time, one decision at a time, one equal sign at a time... I will be adding to this world a measure of love.
Love,
Arguably the Most Loving Father in the World
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