The worst injury I ever had was after I decided to try sleeping and driving at the same time. Let this be one of those "learn from mentors and not from mistakes" moments for you. IT DOESN'T WORK. Apparently vision and cognition are necessary to manipulate a curve while moving at a rate of 45-55 miles per hour in a sweet-mule Buick Regal. Just a few tiny bumps and bruises; Oh yeah and a flappy ear, as in cut off and clinging on for survival (don't worry; ear reattached), and two broken ribs with one of them ever so slightly stabbing into my LUNG. So there I am kicking it in the hospital with my newly reconstructed ear, a radiator hose stuck in my chest to drain lung juice, and two broken ribs reminding me with every slight motion, "Remember that time you tried to drive while sleeping? That was dumb." Raise your hand if you have ever broken ribs. Perfect. Good then you get it. I would rather [fill in the blank] than go through that again. It is truly excruciating. (And obviously there is a limit to the "fill in the blank." I would probably rather break my ribs again than let's say show up to church in nothing but my underwear...but just probably.)
Sticks and stones broke my bones. And just to be clear about this being the worst injury of my life thus far: I was life-flighted from the scene of the accident and spent a week in ICU.The memory is very real, but the pain is gone. I am not groaning every day from my injury 15 years ago. As a matter of fact, I was back at my daily routine after just a few days in ICU and about 9 weeks of "taking it easy."
Sticks and stones broke my bones. And just to be clear about this being the worst injury of my life thus far: I was life-flighted from the scene of the accident and spent a week in ICU.The memory is very real, but the pain is gone. I am not groaning every day from my injury 15 years ago. As a matter of fact, I was back at my daily routine after just a few days in ICU and about 9 weeks of "taking it easy."
"But names will never hurt me": it's just not true. I have a lot of names piled up that hurt me for a long time. I stored the words of the people I looked up to, the people that I loved, and even pure strangers. I remember being mocked for my terrible acne. (It was actually pretty bad. Like meat lovers pizza bad.) I still stress to this day as an adult when my face breaks out because I am worried what people will think about me. I had insecurities built up like a wall because of all the broken promises of family and love. Words built that wall brick by brick. It was easy for me to get close to people because I had a huge family; shy couldn't exist when there are 16 mixed and mingled brothers and sisters. However, there was always a tipping point for me, and I Houdini-ed every single relationship that got too real. I had to. Self preservation and survival was the name of the game. I have been to many a counseling session to fix that one. And then there are the standards set for me with the words of the higher-than-thous. These people painted the word "failure" over and over on the canvas of my internal being when they preached perfection instead of grace. I started going to church when I was in the eighth grade. It was awesome, but to that little 14 year old boy, he saw the white wash--not the mess beneath--and struggled with his own rubbish heap. I am thankful for those that made relationship with God real for me when they taught me new words like mercy, grace, love, and joy.
The pain of words hurt more. Way more. They last longer and they follow us into every crack and crevice of life. Stitches, band-aids, casts, surgery, etc. can fix the fury of sticks and stones. On the other hand, healing the brokenness of words is much more difficult. There is a verse in the Bible that speaks of confessing sins one to another and the healing therein. I also believe when we start confessing the hurt of words to one another we can start finding healing therein. People suck. We use our words so often to tear people down rather than to build them up. Hidden in every hurtful word (purposely placed or "accidentally" overflowed) is an unfulfilled desire, promise, or expectation. We have the ability to reverse and retrain the hurt of words by simply choosing the right words to say. Start saying the right words to each other--every day--it matters.
Dear Sweet Child of Mine,
May my promises be few and timely. May my words always bring you joy. I will always do my best to protect you from the hurtful words of others. And I will make sure the defining moments of your life are absorbed in grace, mercy, peace and love.
Love,
Arguably The Best Dad In The World
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